2 Chainz Pets a $100,000 Dog

Another GQ magazine post? Yup. This time it’s about their series, “Most Expensive Sh*t” featuring 2 Chainz. If you’re not familiar, lemme ‘splain. 2 Chainz is rich. Rich rappers buy ridiculously expensive sh*t. GQ presents Mr. Chainz with some of the most expensive items on Earf to see if Chainz will buy said items. Ipso facto, web series.

2 Chainz has…

…eaten ice cream sundaes that cost $1,000

…used a $5,000 toothbrush

…tasted a $295 burger

…stayed in a $25,000 a night hotel

…worn a $25,000 hat

…listened to $30,000 headphones

…shopped for a $2,000,000 car

…worn a bulletproof suit (very baller, 50 Cent called)

I have a confession: I know who 2 Chainz is (he’s Nancy Grace’s greatest foil! and recurring guest on SNL) but I struggle to name any of his songs off the top of my balding head. I know he’s been on songs I like (most notably “Bubble Butt“) and he has songs that I could NOT STOP repeating this past summer (“I’m Different“), but if someone’s got a gun pointed at my dome-piece ordering me to bust into 2 Chainz lyrics, the only lyric I instinctively knew from my memory is just melodically yelling, “2 Chainz!” with that stanky inflection. See ya, cranium.

In this episode, GQ introduces 2 Chainz to dogs that cost $100,000. Here’s the recap from GQ:

“2 Chainz really likes dogs, but would he actually drop 100 stacks on a puppy? See what happens when the rapper visits a bulldog breeder who charges top dollar for premium pups.”

If you’d rather see bikini models snuggle expensive puppies, here ya go:

I think the next logical step is to do a spin-off called, “Least Expensive Sh*t” and have 2 Chainz try those Burger King nuggets that cost $1.49. Seriously, less than $0.15 per nugget, BK? That’s not chicken, is it. I’ll take a dozen.