Jevo is The World’s First Fully Automated Jell-O Shots Maker

The Savory thinks you should call Jevo, the world’s first “fully automated” shot maker “The Keurig of the gelatin world”. Urban Dictionary seems to think it’s “Puerto Rican slang for ‘boyfriend'” or a “friend with benefits“. Both descriptions are spot on. This machine is a solid wingman who lets you take the credit.

I’ve only tried to make Jell-O shots once. It was for a porn-themed party when I was in grad school at Hopkins (circa 2003). We ended up just throwing it all into a giant bowl and people scooped it out with their hands. Remember when you were young and didn’t care what kind of diseases you could get because you were hammered all the time? *sigh* Now I remember those days every single day because I have some kind of new illness from years of disrespecting my body as a Ute. (Btw, that same party had “boob pong”, an adult film soundtrack mixtape and a blow-up doll and girls still came… not that kinda came… at least not for me. Also, the dog we bought from the pound died like 2 days later. Completely unrelated.)

Anyway, I love the idea behind Jevo, but unless you’re running a college bar or Second Lieutenant of Social Chairing at Spring Break, do you – Johnathan Q. Public – really need one? How often are you serving Jell-O shots at your parties? You could bring it to parties but then are you the Jell-O shot guy? Are you Bill Cosby now minus the heavy sedatives?

The only times I’ve had Jell-O shots are at holiday parties and St. Patrick’s Day. Something about giving and receiving and getting lucky makes people want to suck down animal tendons & ligaments. The top of the food chain is a weird, but fun, place.

Via Gawker (Casey Chan) & Vimeo (Ryan Matthew Smith)