The Digital Story of Don Draper Is The “Jaws” of Catfishing

I can’t tell you how hard it is to power through this Mad Men binge-watch marathon me and the lady are attempting right now #netflixproblems. We’re about 20+ episodes deep, which means we’re probably almost through season 2 and we still have another 60 to go. It’s a mad rush to catch up in time to watch the last season and actually contribute to the conversation.

Watching this video from Vanity Fair titled, “The Digital Story of Don Draper”, I knew I’d run into spoilers and I still watched. As a grown-azz man, I understood that I’m way behind and that sh*t’s out there, just about everything’s been public knowledge for years now and there’s no need to say “spoiler alert” when the expiration date is long gone. That said, I still dig it, man.

I just wish there was like an abridged or condensed version of the show that eliminates all the bullshit that doesn’t matter. Like this priest subplot with Colin Hanks. God bless him, but it’s more irritating than valuable to the overall show’s plot. How does this come into play? I’m praying that storyline has a big payoff #blessed.

the office michael blessed

You know how Comedy Central put out an “enhanced version” of the Bieber Roast complete with social media commentary? AMC should give us a 22-30 minute version of “Mad Men” in which they cut out extraneous nonsense and maybe do a whole Pop Up video thing where missed / cut scenes are explained in like a line of text on-screen. “Betty went horseback riding and a guy who looks like Judge Reinhold hit on her then got set up with that other woman no one knows or cares about, no offense.”

judge reinhold

Anyway, this video, huh? Good, right? I remember watching last night’s 3 or 4 episode stretch and thinking hot damn, people loved to cheat on each other back then. The infidelity was rampant. Like the video game “Rampage” but when you lose and go back to being a naked person that naked person finds the other monster-turned-human and they throw caution to the wind and bang while their significant others are laying in the rubble of their demolished apartment building.

rampage video game

I actually Googled, “infidelity rate in the US in the 1960s” and Siri was like, “MIND YA BIZNESS!” and turned off my smartphone. I think the high infidelity (sequel to “High Fidelity”?) was because there was little to no way to track your partner. Now, everyone’s got a smartphone with GPS locators and is connected to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, snapchat, foursquare (no? just me?), Meerkat, Periscope, etc that you’d have to be 007 or Stonewall Jackson to pull anything off.

stonewall jackson?

But even back then your trangressions would catch up to you. Eventually Bobbie Barrett lets it slip that she was getting “The Don Draper Treatment” because bitches be talkin’. Anyway, it’s pretty obvious that Don Draper would be catfished once and then become the catfisher from then on. Like, Don’s the kind of guy who might end up like Bob Durst. That turn you on, ladies?

robert durst blink

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