That Had To Be The Least Emotional Upset Win In Giants History

The Giants upset the Chiefs in overtime, 12-9, and I remain unmoved. I can’t remember the last time I felt so empty and emotionless after a Giants win. This feeling can only be described as blah on blah on blah.

I didn’t write a recap last week after the Giants fell to the San Fran 0-9ers but here’s my quick take:

A 49ers receiver LOST HIS SON DURING BIRTH then later that day played with WAY more fire and desire than the man covering him. Janoris Jenkins was an absolute joke. If he’s not embarrassed beyond all belief after watching the game film, then he’s a stone cold sociopath.

My wife’s friend asked why the 49ers were so bad and I said it was because they don’t have a good quarterback and then Beathard immediately threw a long bomb for a touchdown. Beathard had a career day. The Niners had a career day filled with a lot of firsts. Then again, people fail to realize the 49ers have lost five games by a field goal or less.

Still, if I were John Mara, I wouldn’t let the coaching staff on the plane ride back. I’m thoroughly impressed with how patient Giants ownership is. McAdoo set the record for number of times saying “look at the tape” during the post-game press conference. Who knows what the front office thinks after the team’s stunning victory over KC.

At the beginning of the week, I would’ve thought the Chiefs would’ve scored 100. I stacked my daily fantasy teams with Chiefs: Alex Smith, Tyreek Hill, Travis Kelce, Kareem Hunt. That’s a diabolical combination. But then, I listen to a couple podcasts, read a couple articles, and gamblers are advising bettors to take the G-Men against the spread. Hmmm.

Heading into the game, I’m thinking ‘Alright, maybe we won’t get blown out of the stratoshphere. Maybe we only lose a score or two.’ Then, I find out Sterling Shepard’s out due to migraines, BJ Goodson won’t suit up, and Justin Pugh’s inactive. How does this squad even stand a dang chance?

This ugly win was more reminiscent of 2016. A staunch defense that bent but didn’t break. An offense that didn’t do a ton, but also didn’t do anything costly. Defense never got smoked or burnt. Came up big on third downs. Am I simply giddy about the defense’s overall play? Not totally. Multiple times defenders didn’t attack or finish. How Alex Smith was able to repeatedly sacrifice his body for first downs and not pay for it is inexcusable.

Unlike previous games in 2017, the defense made stops on third down as KC only converted 3 of 11 opportunities. That much-maligned unit also went into lockdown mode in the red zone and goal-to-go.

All of this from a group that was without Eli Apple, who was a healthy scratch. It’s like the entire secondary decided to act a fool one-by-one. Like, okay DRC, you throw a hissy fit this week. JackRabbit, you just straight up don’t show up another week. Who’s down to disappoint this fanbase and send the clubhouse into chaos this week? How about our first round draft pick last year? Word.

UPDATE (11/20/17 @12:42pm): Didn’t realize Eli Apple’s mom, Annie, underwent brain surgery. Hoping for a speedy and strong recovery.

Landon Collins had himself a game. Fourteen tackles, 10 of which were solo. He STUCK Charcandrick West on that one pass in the flat.

I only had two knocks on LC. First was not barreling through the back on his blitz that ended up in a long completion to Kelce. Oh, and by the way, Olivier Vernon was in coverage on that pass. That play would lead to the game-tying field goal that sent the game into overtime. Second was so minor I don’t even want to mention it, but nearly allowing Kelce behind him on one of Smith’s rollouts could’ve been deadly.

The guys on NBC’s Football Night in America said it best: Andy Reid gets a little too cute sometimes. The backwards pass to Kelce who then chucked a pick was peak cute Reid.

That said, the intended receiver had a beat. If Kelce throws it more towards the pylon, maybe it has a chance. Yet, I just don’t get how both coaches decided to derail promising drives with gimmicks.

How nuts was it that in Week 11 of the Giants season the defensive line tallied more interceptions than the secondary?

The Giants offense was actually better on fourth down than on third down. Eli had a very uneven game. He actually stood tall in the pocket and didn’t have happy feet. When he felt pressure he ran with confidence instead of collapsing like someone who’s been tased. He badly missed an open back on what would’ve been a sure touchdown. Then again, his targets dropped perfectly placed balls.

Orleans Darkwa had a nice game. Seems like every carry, he’s pushing the pile forward an extra yard or three. I mean, he can’t catch a ball worth a damn, but he’s the power runner the Giants have been thirsting for. We got to see a rushing touchdown, y’all!

Give it up one time for the offensive line. My peanut brain can’t comprehend how this makeshift, duct tape and chewing gum O-line is producing. Eli Manning wasn’t sacked. Undrafted free agent Chad Wheeler gets his first start in place of Pugh and in spite of Bobby Hart and doesn’t look like dog doo doo.

John Jerry is just weird. Really, man? You’re gonna throw a soccer-style head-butt on a defender after the play?

Hey Neal, when did you know Ben McAdoo’s mind officially flew the coop? Was it when he ran a fake punt with a backup safety in his own territory? Was it when Shane Vereen tossed an interception? Nope, it was running a freakin’ jet sweep to a dude I’ve never even heard of before on a crucial third down. Talk about the element of surprise, leaning on Kalif Raymond – a player who hasn’t seen the field in 10 weeks – is as eye-opening as it gets.

Good to see Roger Lewis, Tavarres King, and Travis Rudolph all had multiple receptions in one game. The grab Lewis pulled off on his back to effectively win the game was majestic.

What in the actual fudge, Aldrick Rosas. My dude had the worst miss of an extra point I’ve ever seen. If he makes that extra point, we don’t have to lose years of our lives in overtime. It’s unacceptable that the team hasn’t brought in a tractor-trailer truck of kickers for tryouts. What does management see in this guy? He knocks in two chip shots and smiles like he’s got screws loose. YOU’RE COSTING US GAMES, GUY!

It still grinds my gears that Janoris Jenkins picks off Alex Smith in KC territory with just a little over 2 minutes left in the contest, and the offense can’t hammer home the final nail in the coffin. You get into field goal range, which is great. You make the Chiefs burn two timeouts. Then, your veteran quarterback throws an incompletion to stop the clock on third down. Instead of burning nearly 40 seconds and leaving KC with less than a minute to drive, Alex Smith has enough clock to send into OT.

I was excited when the Giants shocked the Broncos in Denver. A very small part of me thought maybe this team will reel off the ultimate win-some-for-all-the-Gippers and defy the odds and grind out wins. My eyes read actual articles from actual professional journalists mapping out the Giants’ road to the playoffs. WE WERE 1-5!!!!! Then, they got atomic wedgied three games in a row, removing any doubt that they’ll be spectators come postseason.

We saw what happened to the Broncos after their loss to the Giants. They Titanic’d hard. And that’s sort of why I’m not that pumped about this win over the Chiefs. KC started the season 5-0. They’ve gone 1-4 since then. Maybe this is just beginning of the end for Andy Reid’s team.

What sucks most about this win is it gives McAdoo another ounce of reprieve. This bro stinks at coaching and wins like this will most likely save his job.

A LOOK AHEAD AT THE SCHEDULE:
Thanksgiving night at Washington who will be without Chris Thompson
At the Raiders who looked like hot garbage in Mexico City against Los Patriots
Home against the Cowboys without Ezekiel Elliott
Home against the Eagles who are flying way too close to the sun
At the Cardinals who lost to Tom Savage
Home against the Skins who will be playing for their playoff lives

8 and 8 here we come!