This Shockey-Toomer Twitter Fight Reduces Me To Being a Child of Divorce

It all started with New York Daily News reporter Gary Myers lobbing a rumor about Jeremy Shockey wanting to play for the Giants again into the Twittersphere. It ends with me feeling like a 10-year-old kid who just saw his divorced parents fight over an alleged affair some 4 years ago. Toomer comes out guns blazing, saying that it would be a huge mistake for the G-men to take J-Shock back then Jeremy retorted with a statement about Toomer pissing on his ex’s “cloths”. The once great TE also blames Amani for breaking his leg in a 2007 regular season game against the Redskins, which effectively ended Jeremy’s Giants career but also (many believe) allowed the Giants to go on their run to the Super Bowl. Here’s the full rundown…

In all fairness, Amani did strike first with the, “Bad teammate. Worse person” comment.

OH SNAP!

I just watched the video over on NFL.com (about the 1:25 mark) and, to me, it doesn’t look like Toomer’s “loafing”, it just looks like he sucks at blocking. Don’t think he got manhandled either. Toomer (6’3″ 210 lbs) tries to crack back on LaRon Landry (6’0″ 220 lbs) but only gets a piece, rolls off and falls on the back of Shockey’s leg. Here’s the screengrab…

But Amani’s last tweet isn’t sitting well with Jeremy, so we get this…

Self-deprecating. Kind of refreshing. I think? But, he still doesn’t feel right, so he seeks out Strahan for reassurance…

And the sackmaster turned PR spin doctor / relationship guru / mediator comes in to chill them motherf*ckers OUT…

“Now now kids. What seems to be the problem? Talk to your Uncle Michael”…

This honestly reads like a counselor or therapist just entered a cyber room and is disarming like whoa…

And there you have it. Toomer and Shockey hug and we all forget that little spat. Thank you, Michael. It’s still amazing to me how much the Giants star players hated each other from 2002-2007. Tiki was pissing people off, Strahan rubbed people the wrong way, Shockey and Burress were constantly bickering over who should get the ball in the huddle. Can you imagine if they played like an ACTUAL team? Like the 2 teams that won Super Bowls? The Giants would be a friggin’ dynasty.

Instead, I’m stuck alternating weekends between Toomer’s crib in Weekawken and Shockey’s bachelor pad in Miami. Toomer showing off his Super Bowl ring and saying, “Look what we did without your tight end” and Jeremy saying, “Look what I did without your team”. Just… move on, guys. You’re making all Giants fans uncomfortable. I’m going to stay at Eli’s house.