I completely forgot that I’d written myself a letter in December 2005. It was delivered to me this past weekend with the subject line, “Are You Rich and/or Happy Yet?”
I don’t want to include the entire letter, but here are some notable highlights:
First off, to address the subject line. The answers are “No and romantically yes, but not professionally.”
“As of today, you haven’t worked out in almost 5 months. You’ve been limited since the surgery on your shoulder but the range of motion is now back and 2006 looks to be better all around from a health standpoint. If rehab goes well, you might be able to play ball come this summer. Even if baseball is not an option, you should be able to pack on some muscle.”
I didn’t play in 2006 or 2007. Made 1 good start in 2008 then tore my ACL in 2009 and meniscus in 2013. Also threw out my back in 2014. Womp womp. No muscle has been packed. I lost the luggage that had the muscle. Plenty of other baggage, though.
“Start a savings account! Social Security will NOT exist once you hit 40. Will you still be alive at 40? At this pace, I can’t see you living beyond 35.”
Jesus, I’m morbid. No wonder I’m looking over my shoulder constantly.
“2006 is a great anniversary. It’s been 20 years since the Giants and Mets actually won a world championship.”
2006 was okay for the Mets and Giants. Mets went to Game 7 of the National League Championship Series and the Giants made the playoffs and fell just short in the Wild Card against Philly. Since then the Mets had 2 historic collapses in 2007 and 2008 then finally turned it around in 2015 thanks Yoenis Cespedes, Daniel Murphy, and the starting rotation of deGrom, Thor, and Two-Face aka Harvey. The Giants won 2 improbable Super Bowls, but have missed the playoffs 6 of the last 7 seasons.
“It’s been 20 years since your sister was born. Your sister will get married before you. She’ll have a kid before you tie the knot.”
My sister did get married before me and she did have a kid before I tie the knot. Nealstradamus, homies!
2006 will ultimately go down as the worst year of our lives as we lost our father who passed away in July.
“Out of everything I’ve outlined above, I hope you have finally rid yourself of negativity. It remains one of your biggest downfalls.”
Still working on that.
“I hope I can make amends with my enemies because grudges are the worst.”
Woof. 0 for 2.
“Lastly, I hope that these apocalyptic dreams end. Living (and sleeping) in fear is no way to go through life.”
Still having ’em.
“Sell 1 screenplay. Just ONE GD screenplay! Maybe it’s time to stop writing about underground, indie crap and start thinking commercial. You can still be funny and dramatic and entertaining with a hackneyed plot but as the motto goes these days, “MAKE IT FUN!””
Nope.
“You’ll make it out to LA one day.”
Well, I did visit LA a couple times. I interviewed for a position there.
“You WILL be successful.”
Still not as successful as I would’ve hoped, but it feels like I’m on the precipice.
“You will not forget those that have helped along the way.”
Looking back on the list of people I had was weird. Really weird. And, of course, I talk about not holding grudges then I end the letter with a list of people NOT to be thankful for. Great job, good effort.
“Stay classy San Diego,
Neal David Lynch”
I think I just recently stopped repeating Anchorman quotes.
I also wrote a letter to be delivered to myself in December 2025. I definitely for sure overused the word “hope”.
Here’s a list of predicted and scheduled events that take place in 2025, according to Wikipedia:
The FAA will have been implementing a new system of GPS called NextGen that will be fully functional by this year. NextGen proposes to transform America’s air traffic control system from a ground-based system to a satellite-based system. GPS technology will be used to shorten routes, save time and fuel, reduce traffic delays, increase capacity, and permit controllers to monitor and manage aircraft with greater safety margins.
I look forward to the day when I can get a window seat and wave to, flip off, and/or moon the guy in the window seat in the plane next to me.
The Giant Magellan Telescope, which is currently under construction, is scheduled to have been completed. The telescope is expected to have the resolving power 10 times greater than the Hubble Space Telescope, and will be the largest optical observatory in the world.
I still can’t see Uranus.
Planned completion of the Square Kilometre Array. It will operate over a wide range of frequencies and its size will make it 50 times more sensitive than any other radio instrument. It will require very high performance central computing engines and long-haul links with a capacity greater than the current global Internet traffic. It will be able to survey the sky more than ten thousand times faster than ever before.
Better get your sneak attacks in now, Aliens. Just don’t pick Independence Day.
CVN-80, the United States Navy’s proposed replacement for the USS Nimitz (CVN-68), to be commissioned. PCU Enterprise (CVN-80) is to be the third Gerald R. Ford-class aircraft carrier to be built for the United States Navy. She will be the ninth ship and the third aircraft carrier in the history of the United States Navy to bear the name. CVN-80 will also be the first U.S. aircraft carrier since America was commissioned in 1966 not to be named in honor of a person.
This is great and all but they better get to work on making it more like the helicarrier from Avengers…
Via Sploid / Gizmodo
or the Imperial Destroyer ships from Star Wars…
Via Rebloggy
Estimated completion of the tallest skyscraper in the world, Dubai City Tower. It will be much taller than any other current man-made structure, at almost three times the height of the Burj Khalifa and almost seven times taller than the Empire State Building.
Now, we’re cooking with oil. This is how buildings of the future are supposed to look like. Like the frozen tentactle of a giant kaiju.
Both Voyager 1 and Voyager 2 space probes have sufficient electrical power to operate their radio transmitters until at least 2025. Voyager 1 is a space probe launched by NASA on September 5, 1977. Part of the Voyager program to study the outer Solar System, Voyager 1 launched 16 days after its twin, Voyager 2. Having operated for 38 years, 3 months and 8 days, the spacecraft still communicates with the Deep Space Network to receive routine commands and return data. At a distance of 133 AU (1.99×1010 km) as of autumn 2015, it is the farthest spacecraft from Earth and the only one in interstellar space. Voyager 2 is the only spacecraft to have ever visited either of the ice giants.
Ah yes, the Voyagers. The paparazzi of our galaxy. Snapchat needs to offer snaps from these probes. Will Snapchat even exist in 2025?
The following films take place in 2025:
- Heaven Can Wait (1978): Joe Pendleton (Warren Beatty)
- Timecop 2: The Berlin Decision (2003)
- Repo Men (2010)
- Pacific Rim (2013) – YES! Giants Aliens vs. Robots!
- Her (2013) – People making out with their operating systems and stuff.
The following TV shows took place (at one point) in 2025:
- Transformers: Victory (1989)
- Six Feet Under (“Everyone’s Waiting”, 2005)
- Power Rangers S.P.D. takes place in this year, where humans are introduced to aliens, which is dated to be 20 years after 2005.
The following computer and video games take place in 2025:
- F.E.A.R. (2005) is a survival horror first-person shooter a fictional special forces team—is called to contain. The player assumes the role of F.E.A.R.’s Point Man, who possesses superhuman reflexes, and must uncover the secrets of a paranormal menace in the form of a little girl.
- Haze (2008) is a first-person shooter video game where the Mantel Corporation rule the world with a drug called Nova-Keto-Thyrazine – also called Nectar, a “nutritional supplement” that enables soldiers to fight harder and smarter, but also induces a hallucinogenic effect.
- Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 (2012) is a first-person shooter the first game in the Call of Duty franchise to feature future warfare technology and the first to present branching storylines driven by player choice as well as selecting weapons before starting story mode missions. And it had zombies.
Also according to Wikipedia, the US will be approaching a projected population of 360M people. India is projected to surpass China as most populous nation in the world. New York City will have almost 21M people. LA will have almost 14M, Chicago almost 10M. I’m planning on adding 2 people into the mix and I encourage others to limit to 2. Seriously, no more of this…
Via Giphy
Neal Lynch 
You must be logged in to post a comment.