Recent Posts

Yandy's sexy Handmaid's Tale halloween costume

RIP Sexy “Handmaid’s Tale” Halloween Costume, A Major Loss for Feminism

Yandy, a big-name Halloween costume company, released quite possibly THE Halloween costume of 2018: Sexy Handmaid’s Tale maiden costume.

New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning looks surprised his remade offensive line still sucks.

One Giant Step Backwards for Manning, One Giants Rant for Mankind

I’ve seen enough to have seen enough. After two weeks, the 2018 New York Giants season is over. Commence meltdown.

New York Giants running back Saquon Barkley

Giants Muff Winnable Game Against Coughlin’s Aggravating Jagoffs

Here’s my analysis of the New York Giants’ 20-15 loss to Tom Coughlin’s Jacksonville Jaguars in Week 1 of the 2018 NFL season.

New York Giants wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr.

Odell Beckham Will Be the First Highest Paid WR to Win a Super Bowl

Odell Beckham is now the NFL’s highest paid wide receiver. It’s a bittersweet moment for Giants fans but it’s about to be a historic moment.

Neal Lynch contact lens bloodshot eyes

I Got a Contact Lens Stuck to My Eyeball and Almost Went Blind

Doctors found a lost 28-year-old contact lens in a woman’s eyelid. It reminded me of the time I got a contact lens stuck to my eyeball and almost went blind.

Gatorade catheter

Gatorade Made Me So Dehydrated During Training Camp I Needed a Catheter

With football training camp in full swing, I’m reminded of the time I was so dehydrated during camp that I needed a catheter.

New York Giants running back Saquon Barkley rips off a 39-yard run on his first carry against the Cleveland Browns in a NFL preseason game.

The Giants Loss to the Super Bowl-bound Browns Is Why I Hate The Preseason

The Browns-Giants game on Thursday night was further proof of why I hate the NFL preseason. My reaction, recap, review, and ruminations are below.

Game Night movie poster on the left, Thanos of Avengers Infinity War artwork on the right.

MoviePass is About To Pass, So Here’s My Movie Ticket Prices Proposal

We’re approaching the one-year anniversary of MoviePass offering their $9.95 per month subscription plan. Here’s my proposal for movie ticket prices moving forward.

Lakeith Stanfield as Cassius "Cash" Green in Sorry To Bother You

‘Sorry to Bother You’ Has a Mind-Melting Plot Twist for the History Books

Went to see ‘Sorry to Bother You’ on Sunday evening and was blown away by the plot twist.

The Spinner downloads cookies to your target's device and supplies tailored articles to influence target.

New Ad Technology Convinces Your Wife To Initiate Sex for Less Than $30

The Spinner lets you influence others through a campaign of tailored news articles on websites that the target visits. Is it ‘pure evil’?


Students are Anxious About This Facial Recognition Technology in Classrooms But I Need It At All Times

A high school in China is using facial recognition technology to record facial expressions of students in classrooms and I’d love to get my hands on it for personal use.

New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning in Madden video game.

No One Should Care About Madden Ratings, But Eli Manning Getting a 76 is Obnoxious

Eli Manning deserves WAY way better than a Madden rating of 76 and I’ll explain why.

Chris Pratt taking a selfie next to the Indoraptor featured in Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom for Entertainment Weekly

The ‘Jurassic World’ Franchise Needs Better Bad Guys in a Big Way

Went to see Jurassic World : Fallen Kingdom on Friday night and now I have opinions about the bad guys.

New York Giants cornerback Janoris Jenkins on the left. Jenkins' neighbor, Patti Golick, on the right.

Janoris Jenkins’ Neighbor is a Person of Interest in that She’s an Interesting Person

Here’s a video of Janoris Jenkins’ neighbor in Fair Lawn, Patti Golick, getting interviewed by ABC 7, the reactions on Twitter, and my thoughts.

New York Mets outfielder Brandon Nimmo points to the heavens after scoring a run.

It’s Time To Accept Brandon Nimmo as Our Mets Lord and Savior and Make Him an All-Star

Brandon Nimmo has gone from trade bait to potential All-Star. Why hasn’t it taken so long to accept him and why he deserves to be an All-Star.

New York Mets manager Terry Collins getting ejected after Noah Syndergaard threw behind Chase Utley in a 2016 MLB baseball game.

What Does ‘Our Ass is in the Jackpot Now’ Mean?

Audio of Terry Collins getting ejected after Noah Syndergaard threw behind Chase Utley surfaced and one of the umpires said, “Our ass in the jackpot now”. I try to figure out what it means.

Neal Lynch auditions for Barstool Sports' Barstool Idol

A Thorough Examination of My Barstool Idol Audition Video

Here’s my Barstool Idol audition ‘tape’ that I submitted to Barstool Sports along with my thoughts on why I didn’t get picked.

Soon-to-be former New York Mets pitcher Matt Harvey with a big ol' chaw dog.

Matt Harvey Has One of the Most Epic Falls from Grace in Mets History

Matt Harvey has been designated for assignment by the Mets, effectively ending his tumultuous tenure with the team.

Silicon Valley's Donald "Jared" Dunn, played by actor Zach Woods

Sillicon Valley is Dead, Bring On the Jared Spin-Off ASAP

Ding Dong, Silicon Valley is dead. After watching the Season 5 premiere, I feel confident enough to call it. Here’s why HBO should bring on Jared’s spin-off like rn.

Penn State Nittany Lions running back Saquon Barkley was selected second overall in the 2018 NFL Draft by the New York Giants

Saquon Barkley Has Lit an Inferno Within My Soul, The Giants are Super Bowl Bound

I didn’t know the New York Giants needed Saquon Barkley until Roger Goodell announced his name at the 2018 NFL Draft.

Denver Broncos punter Riley Dixon throwing a pass against the Tennessee Titans

Riley Dixon is My New Favorite Giant and It’s All Thanks To This Hype Video of His Trick Plays

The New York Giants traded for Denver Broncos punter Riley Dixon. The hype video of Dixon’s fake punts and fake field goals at Syracuse has officially won me over as a fan.